This has been our saying for the last 3 years and turned into a WAIL for the last year. About a year ago, our well started silting in, giving us even less water.
If only we had city water we could...
*pressure wash the house
*let the kids play in the sprinkler on hot days
*take long showers and baths
*flush the toilet as much as we want
*feel justified in turning our 2 story 2 car garage into living space
*water our garden when our rain barrels run dry
*do laundry at our house
The list goes on and on. And all of these things above are inconveniences. See, I have ALWAYS wanted to live in the country. In 2008,. we bought this beautiful 14.5 acre farm with a nice little house, backing up the the National Forest. Very secluded and perfect. In 2010 we bought an adjoining 9 acres from our neighbor.
See, we are the only road in our county without city water....
And when we bought this house, we were rightly told that city water was in the works and it would only be a few more years.
Well, we have been here 3 years now and it appears that we are no more closer to city water than we were at the beginning. Our county commissioner that got voted out last year told us that we would have our water by September of this year.
Not the first shovel full of dirt has been dug.
So, it was very tight, living with a family of 5 on a well that the driller told us would support a family of 4 if we conserved. But now we are a family of 7 and it is just not enough. Even with all the above inconvienences AND two more kids, I still wanted to hold on to this land. Aaron would mention selling because he was fed up long ago. I would beg "please, it is our dream!"
After going to Ethiopia and seeing all of the beautiful children in need of parents, we decided that we would, Lord willing, adopt again..
I kept reminding God that there were a few things we needed before we could adopt again...
1. to pay off the last adoption
2. to have city water
3. to turn our attached garage into more living space
Aaron mentioned about a month ago, that if we had city water, he didn't care how many children we adopted. STOP! that right there was a miracle from GOD in and of itself. You see. this is the same guy who was always happy with one child, then he was happy with 2, then he was happy with 3, and originally, the main reason he adopted was because I always wanted to. Also the same guy who when I mentioned in Jan 2010 that I thought we were supposed to ask for 2 children, didn't tell me until September that he thought God was telling him that too.
Yet while in Ethiopia, through no prompting by me said "next time we adopt, I want a little girl"
Back to city water (because our whole life revolves around the lack of it).
Like I said, the above list were inconveniences, but here is where this house, without city water, is coming between us and serving God.
I started thinking of things we can't do because of no water, and these are things that matter.
*invite people over, be hospitable...
*build on...our house is 1200 sq ft. we have 3 kids in one tiny room and 2 in the other tiny room.
And that is when I realized that this "dream" of mine was coming between me and God and what He might want me to do with my life.
Aaron has been willing to sell for a long time, but I was holding on very tightly. But I am willing to let it go now.
Last night we had realtors over to list our house.
I don't know if it will sell. Perhaps God wants us to stay here, perhaps He has different plans, but I know it won't sell if we don't list it. And I want to leave it up to God. How dare I hold on to this dream if it keeps a child(ren) from having parents and a home. Forgive me for my selfishness.
The real "living" will be in Heaven. My real dream home is being built day by day for eternity. Surely I can give up a few things on earth, so that not only I, but more children can someday be in the ultimate dream home!